Unconditinal Love

you know, you would think that there would be unconditional love between friends or loved ones. (xcept family, that's one true love!) i used to think such things do exist! but it seems now, what everyone does for another, they always hope for something in return. When they don't get any returns or special treatment from you, they STOP giving help, or whatever. I guess it is just another reality of life, it is only human to secretly want something back from someone else. i hate it!

ok i just checked the dictionary for the meaning of unconditional love and i think that doesn't mean what i'm trying to say. -_-" only a part of it. er, when you love someone, a friend, you will continuously check up on them right, ask to meet up, help them when they need help? you would assume that they would do that right? your friend would probably assume the same thing, right? if both keeeps assuming that, who's really gonna do it? what, if ur friend stops looking you up, you do the same? what if your friend keeps asking you for help and you don't want to help them cause u think u're on the losing end? ok that's Not Unconditional love. but really, it is only human to do what they think is right. if all you gave them before was a cheap cup of tea, i guess in the end, that's what you get. all the things we learn as a kid, in storybooks or those morale lessons, to help people when they need it, (that's exactly what we do), but don't expect something in return (when does that ever happen?)... unless of course, when you help someone on instinct, a stranger who dropped his books and pencilbox and keys and water bottle all at the same time. but on some friend, there's always somewhere in your heart where you think, ok now he OWES me. muahahaha.. i guess the morale lessons are possible to practice, in certain ways..

hmmm i guess it's called "keikhlasan". shit, what is that called in english? (i just read back what i wrote and man, i jump from here to there! will work on that.)

anyways, do you agree with me when i say , if u think too much, u won't get to it, cause then all you'd do is doubt. seriously, to think or not to think! sometimes spending too much time on ur own gets u to think of ridiculously almost anything. when u're doing your assignment, when you're doing your housechores, when you're walking back to the tramstop. YEELYN! stop thinking!! the past 2 weeks have been busy for me. all assignments that sometimes i have no time to go back home. at one point i didn't go back for 2 nights in a row. had to overnight in a friend's place where it's closer to uni, just to wash up and have short naps. i'm really feeling the torture in Archi-torture. (I like whoever invented this phrase ;)) but i won't say i've been angelic the whole time, i did stop by some shops and bought some things to cheer me up a bit. hehe, and also thanks to iris for the occasional chocolate muffins. yum!!! they really do fulfil your NEEDS.. chocolate... yummm...


until next time! feels good going on abt random stuff. :)