Saturday, April 28, 2007

Hypocrisy & Updates.


what defines hypocrisy?

A behaviour in which someone pretends to have beliefs, principles, or feelings that they do not have. in a simpler way, people who say one thing and do another.

Why are people so full of hypocrisy? Let me try to list the reasons down.

1. Scared of Rejection.

2. To Avoid Arguments.

3. To Not Offend People.

4. Just for the Fun of It.

5. To Solve Issues.


I could only list these few reasons and if any of u have more to share, pls let me know.

I think hypocrisy happens a lot especially when one goes through teenage life and young adulthood. Especially when one's still not secure bout oneself. Like they do or follow or say what others do or say cause they think it's "in" and they will be accepted into the "gang", not knowing if it's really them. But then again, teenagers aren't just the ones using them. Even adults use it every day.

Hypocrisy also happens when people see it as an easy way out and use it so frequently to get their way. Basically, just lie. Yeah? Everyone don't like hypocrits. They say one thing, think the other, to make that person feel happy or to run away frm some trouble that might come from telling the truth.

Here's a thought :

Nobody likes people who lie to them but then, everybody lies.



To me,

i feel that it's alright to be hypocrits when telling the truth really wouldn't benefit anyone. and i mean ANYONE. Like telling someone she doesn't look good right before they go out and they're late! (after they've spent 2 hours deciding what to wear and when she's done, ask if she looks good.) Takkan i say No? Should i say,"I don't like that dress."? It'll only make her feel less confident abt herself for the rest of the day and me looking like a mean mean friend.

Hmm, or say, u just met this friend in class and gotten a little close. say, after 3 or 4 meetings, what would you say if he/she asks : Do i look like i'm some country girl? or Did i give u a good impression when we first met? Did u think i look ugly?

I know. Who asks those questions?? But some people do.

What would you say? how to tell someone something without offending them?

But to not say something so that u won't sound mean but will help the situation if u say it....



For example, Tom and Jerry are good friends. They are invited to a party by their close friend, Snoop. And, Halfway through, Tom felt bored and wants to go back. He didn't want to say anything but just asked Jerry to say something. When he did, and Snoop persuaded them to stay a little longer, Tom pretended nothing happened and didn't back Jerry up whatsoever. I'd be pissed if i were Jerry.

Or say, another example, Tom wanted to go back so much. He knew Jerry had something to do next morning and he used that as an excuse! like, " oh, i wish we could stay longer but Jerry has a busy morning ahead. So, i'm sorry.." and made it sound like everything's Jerry's fault! well, it's really fine if Jerry had said it or if Tom's had Jerry's consent that he's actually fine with Tom saying it.

The solution to this, is, don't blame anyone. If you truly want to go back, just say, "hey, i'm a lil tired and i have something to do tomorrow. Thanks for such a lovely evening!! :)" (even if u don't and if it wasn't!) This kind of hypocrisy, to me, is accepted. Lie the best way u can to make the best outcome of the situation, not to make anyone sound or look bad.


Maybe all i'm trying to say is that everyone looks at hypocrisy as a bad thing. I think with the right amount, it's actually not that bad. It actually helps. But, use it for the right reasons. :)



~~~~~~~~~


Anyways, the couple of weeks have been interesting. There're times when i'm really busy. Times when i'm really Lazy. Times when i'm really like a pig (eat eat eat, sleep sleep sleep). Times when i get a lil depressed and guilty. Times when i really have lots of fun and feed my once-in-a-blue-moon appetite for some sweet delicacies, alcohol and music and dancefloor. :)

It's all good.



The pictures down there are all taken in Clayton when Loris and I decided to visit an old friend's house.


Meeeee-sheelll..


hehe.. It was a friday and we ate at this Korean restaurant. Nice food. I was damn hungry when i got to that restaurant. was waiting and waiting.. then to pass time, mich and i decided to kiss. Yes, you heard me, KISS! This picture actually looked really good. And note the expressions on the guys' faces.




Food arrived and i just stuffed my mouth with food food food. and water water water. When we're done, we walked to Coles and there, i start to feel really "kap"! i needed to release!! and no friggin toilet open at that time! arrrrgh, walked and walked and walked along shops on the way back to the house.



michelle and her aaron.



saw a small casino around the corner and ran straight in to relieve myself!! hehe.. Inside, was, freaky. Middle-aged man and old women smoking and getting high talking and laughing.. don't know if they were flirting.. they look tipsy. it just looked a lil wrong. luckily ian was there.


thanks ian! He's a gentlemaN! always is.




Oh i love pohyee's buttt! hehe.


Finally got back to the house and a lil tired.



Waited.


Waitedd.



Waiteddd.



Don't know what we were waiting for. People were cleaning, were studying(she had test, so understandable), talking on the phone..



Then, yay, Pohyee came and started serving us drinks! Ain't she a darling? after a while mich and her AARON came and join us too. We drank, we talked, we (not i) cried, we kissed, we had fun. basically everything there is in a drinking session. :) Thanks for having us there, mich, poh, and wengkiN!





2 weekends later, we had a clubbing session. I love my make up. :) i had so much fun! i really enjoy getting high and dancing! i love dancing. really really. Here're some pics.

In my room. No photoshop here. Just make up. :)



Loris, Fannie, and Yeelyn. (Fannie's first clubbing experience.)

What we were wearing.

at the club - Lavish.

lilian was there too. She dances great!



Oh, and may i just brag a lil here. I'm so proud of myself. i love just drinking and getting high to one stage and not do anything too stupid to get embarrased over the next day when i wake up but instead, a lil tipsy, have lots of fun, move a lot and laugh a lot!! No puking, No passing out, No fighting and No VANDALISING! ;)

We had a lot of fun, then decided to get home. Before that stopped by erge's apartment. (near Lavish) It was 4am. He was woken up by us! so kesian. and He was soooo nice! i wanted fries. and he actually went out of the house to a fast food restaurant and got them for me! he's the best brother ever!! hehe. love love love you, erge!!

some random pics here : at choco lounge, and sushi. lots of sushi. :)





Well, that's it for now! See ya soon!

hey, bie, i love ya! i was really having fun! Muaksss!

and missing those back home!!

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Love this song.



i know i haven't been uploading. Been busy. Here's a song i came across and i really love it. gosh! click on the link above to listen. it's really good.

Loving Me For Me by Christina Aguilera.

People ask if Im in love with you
Because Im sitting here with your picture
And
smiling to myself
Im kinda
lost in my own thoughts of you
My heart speaks before my mind thinks through
And I blush as I say
yes

What a feeling of
vulnerability coming over me
And Im feeling weak and I cant speak
Never thought Id give in so willingly to a human being
With abilities to set me free
Free, make me be me
Makes me want to say

Your lips, your love, your smile, your kiss
I must admit its a part of me
You please me, complete me, believe me
Like a melody
Your soul, your flow, your youth, your truth is simply proof
We were meant to be
But the best quality thats hookin me
Is that youre loving me for me
Is that youre loving me for me

People ask why Im in love with you
Well, let me start by saying
You got my heart by
just being who you are
And
what we got is between me and you
It doesnt matter about the money I make
Or what I do, or that Im a, huh, a star

Unconditionally youre there for me
Undeniably you inspire me, spiritually, so sweet
This is meaningful, is incredible, pleasurable, unforgettable
The way I feel, so sweet
Makes me want to say

Your lips, your love, your smile, your kiss
I must admit its a part of me
You please me, complete me, believe me
Like a melody
Your soul, your flow, your youth, your truth is simply proof
We were meant to be
But the best quality thats hookin me
Is that youre loving me for me
Is that youre loving me for me

Its so amazing how something so sweet
Has come and rearranged my life
Ive been
kissed by destiny
Oh, heaven came and saved me
An angel was placed at my feet
This isnt ordinary, hes loving me for me

Stripped of all make up, no need for fancy clothes
No cover ups, push ups
With him, I dont have to put on a show
He loves every freckle, every curve, every inch of my skin
Fulfilling me entirely, taking all of me in
Hes real,hes honest, hes loving me for me
Yeah

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

What have become of me? ........... & Easter Holiday.

I need to find myself. I need some peace and quiet.


Who am I?

one minute i was so confident of myself. and the other?

i was disappointed of what i've become. Not original. Not Myself. How did i bring myself to this stage? I thought i was doing myself a favour. taking after what i admire over others. what's good about them, i take. i follow only la.


After a while, i notice, for what?

am i such a bad judge of good/bad behaviour that i can't tell? What have i been following all this while? Who am I? Is this what i really want for myself? Someone who takes after others? I know i don't entirely. Just this one aspect of my life, i did.


i always tell others, be whatever u want to be as long as u think it's right for u. Do i do that? or did i do what they think is right? i don't know. i know i was being me. but now, i'm really doubting myself. What's happeninG????


People Change. They all do. You know that and i know that. Reality hurts, and I just never realized that truth till it hit me on the head leaving a big bump. A bump i'll never forget and never want to get again. When they do change that one big quality in them which i thought was so admirable and have come to practice, i started questioning myself. Why do i feel like changing too? But didn't it work?Didn't it? Why did they change their perception/opinion of which they stood their ground so hard for once upon a time in their life? Is it not working for them? I feel like a big fool now.


Why do i bring myself to worry over other's troubles and problems when really it should be mine i should worry about? Why should i look at how others deal with their problems when i should really focus more on how i can deal with them? To me, i feel that people who follow others have not found enough strength in them to speak up. Not confident enough to be the first to say "No", or "Yes". They taught me how. They showed me how. They're backing out now? It's not their fault.


I've always been happy with myself. especially since i came back to Aus, enjoying life and doing what i think is right. Yet, at the drop of the hat.. things went the other way round.

~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~

I got so agitated and irritated as well when people frequently change their thoughts and opinions. Random, indecisive, so unexpected. If that's how u choose to be, i'd rather u just keep them to yourself. All you do is confuse me further. Words which u spoke once which got through to me, which once meant something to me, doesn't mean anything at all now. You did guide me to become a better person, but the foundation of that turn into rubble when u turn back on ur words, on ur ways.. It's not your fault, it's mine.



Now, i feel : We must be ourselves. We mustn't follow others. We mustn't get influenced. I'm not saying i'm not myself. But do not follow others unless u're certain that's the right step for u. Otherwise, the only fool who suffers would be you..

Be proud of who u are.




Do Not Hide Behind Others.


Guess the only one person i truly admire now on life is my Mother.
Friends change. Lovers change. Only Family Remains.


~~~~~~~~



Anyways, lately been exploring Bars around Melbourne. Been to 3. One experience of which i do not wish to recall ever again, scary lar.. don't blame me k... There was also another dinner at Shoya again. Apparently, Lutfi's new favourite place. It was a farewell dinner for Kio, Jin's highschool friend who's returning to Korea for good. It's kinda funny, as it was My first and Last time meeting him. :) Sorry for being late!



Before that, we went to play badminton at MSAC. also a good opportunity for me to practice before playing with the RMIT Badminton club members the next few days. God, my thighs were aching the next few days! Lutfi was making me run here and there. He apologised later. for doing it on purpose. -_- Thanks Michelle for inspiring me to play sports again! hehe.. and thanks Willie for being a great and friendly VP! U've earned urself a new member! haha.




you know, with this group of friends, i truly feel like i'm amongst business associates or managers (judging by their way of clothing. don't u think?) they're always dressed in blacK!!! if not always, most of the time then! Peer pressure! hehe. and omg, Jin can look so scary if he wants to.. (shivers down my spine..)



We went back to Lutfi's place and played some PS2 games. They're such a bunch of goody-two-shoes. Being with them never makes me feel quilty. Unless of course, expensive dinnerS! ;) oh yeah, i learnt to play soccer! but i still suck. wuwu..


now, to Bars. First one i went to is Charlie's Bar on Hardware Lane.



It's very interesting, this lane. All the italian/western restaurants are lined up on this street and there're tables outdoors. The jazz music played live by musicians along the street clash also with live bands in the restaurants itself. the cool winds of April in Melbourne.. The candles lit on the tables.. with canvases above to block out rain if any.. The environment felt so west!



We did not actually plan to go to Bars. But this waiter who's restaurant which has a bar downstairs says tht there'll be free champagne for another 15 minutes in the bar and suggested us to go there first before having our dinner. we thought, hey, Free champagne! hehe.. let's! there was just me, Fannie and Jin. Lutfi was in Sydney.


This couple never fail to make pictures look any less romantic. grrr! You can see how the setting of the bar is in the pictures. Very Red?




By the way, i saw my tutor there as i was walking out of the toilet. He didn't see me, so, there won't be awkwardness. :) and as i was looking at my tutor, i accidentally bumped into an Aussie, i think around mid-thirties. I apologised and he said this ," Oh, u can trip on me anytime! (handing me his hand to let me up.)" i went, "omggggggg.. -_-" ..


The other bar i went to a few days after that was with Loris, Goh, Jureen and Benjy. This one's called Golden Monkey Bar. This one's more oriental. It's something different from other places.




It was here where i learnt my current favourite drink. Mohito. ( i think that's how it's spelt) i love it! a random shot of Goh downthere. XD



i came here a few days later with my arch foundation girl classmates. Arlene, Martha, Fannie and I. a Girl's night out.




The last bar, i don't really know its name. All i know is that it's located at the back of the cafe beside RMIT building No 8. haha.. A dodgy place really.. Horrible Music.. But all's good.. i guess. Thanks for having me and fannie there, How Keat. Quite an unforgettable Experience. ;)

hmmm, that's how i spent most of my Easter Holiday. see ya sooN!

Anyways, i miss My Boyfriend.


Remember, u are the key to my heart..

hehehe..

Interesting Fact : Rich people have it easy. Donald Trump can make money by just talking. How? He has his own ringtones. and they're just voice clips of him, T-A-L-K-I-N-G!! .. damn. saw it on tv today. i can't believe it.

and ouh yeah, my camera's broken at the moment. so u might expect less pictures in my next few posts.

see ya then!